What If All My Dream Colleges Are Highly Selective?

As students put together their college lists, it’s important for them to do some self-reflection to determine what they are really looking for out of the college experience. Too often, students list highly selective, “name-brand” schools as their dream colleges without determining if these schools are a good fit. In this episode of Just Admit It!, IvyWise admissions experts Tasha and Alecia discuss what a dream college is and how students can create a balanced list of schools they will love.  

Key Takeaways

• Many students equate a dream school with a highly selective or “name‑brand” institution, influenced by rankings, reputation, or pop culture—not necessarily by fit. Admissions experts emphasize that students can (and should) have multiple dream schools, ideally across different levels of selectivity. 
• Schools with acceptance rates below 20–25% are considered highly selective, and many students apply to lists dominated by these schools. This creates risk, especially as more students apply to the same small group of institutions, making outcomes less predictable than in the past. 
• A major issue arises when students choose schools mainly for name recognition rather than personal priorities. Many students struggle to articulate why a school is on their list, signaling a lack of self‑reflection. This tunnel vision can cause students to overlook excellent-fit schools they may enjoy just as much — or more. 
• Fit goes beyond selectivity and prestige. Counselors encourage students to evaluate academic fit, classroom experience, campus culture and location, and support for future goals.
• When students clarify what truly matters to them, they often discover schools they hadn’t previously considered that align better with their needs and aspirations. This reframing helps redefine “dream schools” as places offering the right experience, not just elite branding. 
• Talking with current students and recent graduates provides a more realistic view of campus life than marketing materials alone. Campus visits help students ask better questions and refine what they value. 
• A healthy list typically includes: 2-3 likely schools, 3-4 target schools, and reach schools, which may make up a large portion but should extend beyond the most famous institutions.
• Targets often fall in the 25-40% acceptance-rate range, depending on the student’s profile. Strong target schools are especially important and should feel just as exciting as reach options.
• Students may come in attached to a fixed idea — such as attending a specific Ivy League school — but openness to self-discovery often leads to better outcomes and greater satisfaction. The process itself is an opportunity for personal growth, especially for students who are still figuring out who they are and what they want. 

Podcast Transcript

Tasha:

Hi there. Welcome to season 12, episode five of the IvyWise Just Admit It! podcast, where former deans and directors of admission give expert insight into the complex college admissions landscape. I’m Tasha, your host. I’m an admissions counselor at IvyWise, a former international admissions officer at USC, and a former assistant director of international admissions at Boston University.

This season on the show: FAQs in college admissions. We’ll be spending each episode focusing on a different frequently asked question, breaking it down and answering it thoroughly. Today’s episode: What if all my dream colleges are highly selective? And to help me answer this question is none other than my colleague, Alecia.

Hi, Alecia.

Alecia:

Hi.

Tasha:

Thanks so much for being on the show. Could you please introduce yourself to our listeners?

Alecia:

Absolutely. My name is Alecia Mahato. I’m a counselor at IvyWise, and before that, I was an assistant director of undergraduate admissions at Duke University.

Tasha:

This question comes up a lot — not just regarding a “dream college,” but the feeling that everywhere is highly selective. And so, we wanna break down this question and go through some different avenues to answer this as thoroughly as we can.

I want to start with the language. The idea of a “dream school” has become very popular in the discourse around college admissions — in high schools and the media. Where do you think that comes from in your experience? What is a “dream school” for students?

Alecia:

“Dream school” has become synonymous with a top choice or number one choice. Sometimes it’s highly selective; sometimes it’s not — it depends on what the student is looking for, but it’s the place they hope to land the most.

Tasha:

I’d add that it has a certain mythology to it. Sometimes the way it might be represented in pop culture, or the way folks might talk about it, almost makes it seem like it’s the absolute dream. And then anything that isn’t is somehow a failure or not a good option.

I definitely think it’s great to have dreams, to reach for the stars, to be ambitious. But I think it’s important to break down this concept of a dream school and remember that you can have multiple dream schools. Ideally, you have multiple dream schools that fall in a different range of selectivity and potentially different things that might be important to you.

So, how often do you think we see students that have a dream school that is considered highly selective? And if we could also go ahead and define what highly selective means in our book.

Alecia:

I define highly selective as a school with an admission rate of less than 20%, or sometimes 25%. More often than not, I see students with lists that are 80% to 85% highly selective schools. They might have one or two “likely” schools, but nothing in the middle.

This creates a challenge because there is a shrinking group of what we consider “target” schools, and more students are applying to the same institutions. So, we’re seeing outcomes that are different than what we used to see historically. That’s shifting how we counsel students and how we help students think about the colleges that are on their list.

Tasha:

Is having a list that is 80% to 85% highly selective a problem? How do you work with students to even out that list a little bit so maybe they do find a dream school that isn’t highly selective?

Alecia:

It can be a problem if students aren’t doing enough self-reflection in the process to know what they really want. What I mean is that they’re just putting schools on their list because they’ve heard good things about the name. Maybe they’ve never done a virtual visit or visited in person. They’ve never dug more deeply into exploring why that school is a good fit.

And they can’t really answer the question if we ask why that school is on their list. So, that indicates to me that they’re missing out on the piece of the process that requires them to unpack what kind of experience they’re looking for and then make sure that aligns with all the schools that are on their list. So, I do think it’s problematic that students just focus on the name brand and not so much on the actual experience they’re getting out of it.

The other side that I think can be problematic is that not all students are the same and they’re not all looking for the same experience. But for some reason, they all get sucked into thinking that they want the same experience. So, they all end up applying to the same group of schools, even though there could be other schools out there that could be really great fits for them. They’re missing out on them and getting tunnel vision because of thinking they only need to have this very selective group of schools on their list.

Tasha:

You mentioned that when students have tunnel vision, they often focus on a small, familiar group of schools, even though there may be many others that would be great fits for them. You introduced the idea of “fit,” and I’m curious if you could talk more about what that means and how you help students figure it out.

Many students start with certain schools simply because they’ve heard of them, looked at rankings, or know someone who went somewhere that sounds impressive. But as you noted, students aren’t all the same. How do you counsel students to think about fit?

Alecia:

The first thing we look at is academic fit: Does the school offer the programs or majors the student wants, and can they pursue everything they’re interested in academically? Some students have more specialized interests, so it’s important to confirm that every school on their list actually supports those goals.

Academic fit also includes the type of learning environment where a student will thrive. That often becomes clearer through campus visits — virtual or in person — by talking with students about collaboration, access to professors, and overall classroom culture. For example, is the institution focused primarily on undergraduate teaching or on research? Those are very different experiences.

From there, we talk with students about which of these factors matter most to them and use that information to help build their college list. We also consider other elements of fit, such as location. Some students want to be near a cultural or religious community or close to home. Others care deeply about campus culture, such as having a strong activist community or a particular social environment.

Another important piece is how well a school supports students’ future goals. College websites can offer insight into outcomes and resources for pathways like medical school, business school, dual-degree programs, or early master’s options. What matters is that a student’s undergraduate experience aligns with their long-term plans.

As counselors, it’s our responsibility to surface these factors early so we can identify the true best-fit college for each student. I’ve worked with students who realized later in the process that certain priorities — like being near a city — were more important than they initially thought.

From personal experience, I know how valuable this reflection can be. I attended a school where I had a good experience, but I chose it largely because those around me did. Looking back, I likely would have thrived at a smaller institution, but I didn’t have guidance to explore that option.

Helping students understand that they can have multiple dream colleges starts with helping them clarify what they actually want. When they do, they often discover great-fit schools beyond the most selective options — and realize they could have an equally strong experience at places they hadn’t originally considered.

Tasha:

You mentioned social environments and the different kinds of campus cultures students might want to prioritize. Extracurriculars can also matter a lot for some students. While they generally shouldn’t be the sole focus of a college search, there are cases where an activity is central to a student’s identity.

For example, I worked with a student who had ridden horses her entire life and wanted to be sure there were riding facilities within a reasonable distance from campus, even if the school didn’t have an equestrian team. If there’s something you can’t imagine giving up during your four years in college, that’s worth considering in your search.

At the same time, it’s important to remember that starting a new club is often possible, though it can take significant time and energy. Ultimately, it’s up to each student to decide how important a particular activity is and whether it should factor into how they define fit.

So, let’s talk a little bit about what resources students should look to as they are trying to expand their sense of what a dream school is.

Alecia:

This can be difficult to navigate on your own. A good place to start is by talking to current college students about their experiences. You might begin by asking your school counselor whether they can connect you with students who attend — or recently attended — schools you’re interested in.

Speaking with current students can give you a more honest picture of campus life, including what they enjoy and what they find challenging. Admissions offices are there to advocate for their institutions, but students can offer firsthand insight into what the experience is really like.

These conversations can help you identify what actually matters to you. You may realize, for example, that access to professors is more important than you initially thought, or that being near outdoor activities — like hiking or other weekend adventures — is something you truly value.

As you gain clarity, you’ll start asking more specific questions during virtual visits and in‑person campus visits, which can help you broaden and refine your college list.

Working one‑on‑one with a counselor — ideally in collaboration with your family — can also be incredibly helpful in identifying schools that meet your academic, social, and personal needs. This kind of guidance can uncover a wider range of potential dream schools, not just the most selective ones.

In addition to current students, recent graduates can also be valuable resources. Some admissions offices can connect you with student ambassadors, and speaking with them may help you either see yourself at a particular school or realize it’s not the right fit.

Tasha:

I think we’ve been hovering around this next topic already: Beyond highly selective schools, what other options exist along the admissions spectrum? How can students think about building a range of colleges to apply to — schools that may differ in selectivity but could all realistically become dream schools?

Alecia:

When we talk about building a balanced college list, we generally mean applying to about 12 to 15 schools. Ideally, this includes two to three schools where, based on the student’s profile, we feel fairly confident they’ll receive a positive admissions decision.

From there, many students have around seven to nine reach schools — institutions where admission is possible but uncertain due to low acceptance rates and the many factors that influence decisions. A school might be a reach for one student and a target for another, depending on academic profile, residency, and whether the student is applying Early or Regular Decision.

That usually leaves three to four target schools, which are especially important to cultivate. We work to strengthen both the target and reach categories by broadening them beyond the most well‑known or highly ranked schools. There are many excellent reach schools that don’t make it onto students’ lists but could still be terrific fits.

By expanding reach options beyond the “top 25” and ensuring a solid group of target schools, students can create a more balanced and realistic list. While it’s hard to define targets precisely, they often fall in the range of schools with roughly 25% to 40% acceptance rates, depending on the student’s individual profile.

Tasha:

That’s helpful for understanding the idea of a balanced college list more broadly and how a student can move from a list dominated by highly selective schools to a more realistic mix. But how do students make sure the schools they add can also feel like dream schools?

How do you help students research new options and genuinely get excited about them — especially when they come into the process with a very fixed idea of what college admissions success looks like? Have you worked with students who discovered a school they hadn’t previously considered, and what does it look like to open yourself up to new dream possibilities?

Alecia:

I worked with a student a few years ago who was set on attending the same Ivy League school as his father and brother. His family wasn’t pressuring him, but he felt a strong sense of obligation to continue the legacy. Academically, though, the school wasn’t a good fit, and the outcome was unlikely to be favorable.

My role was to help him consider other options. Through conversations about what he genuinely wanted, we discovered that an open curriculum mattered deeply to him. That insight helped narrow his list considerably, since he didn’t have many other non‑negotiables.

Beyond evaluating his academic profile and its alignment with potential schools, we focused on understanding him as a person and the type of support he would need on campus. We began exploring schools he hadn’t previously considered, starting with virtual visits followed by discussions about what resonated with him and what didn’t. After visiting a few campuses, we were able to refine his list and ultimately curate a group of schools that closely matched the experience he was seeking.

This kind of work requires coming into the process with an open mind, which can be challenging given the constant conversation around “dream schools.” That pressure can make the process feel overwhelming. What’s important for students to understand is that college admissions is highly individual and part of a broader personal journey.

Being open to new information, reflecting on it, and moving forward thoughtfully can help students learn more about themselves and discover schools they may never have considered — but that could be an excellent fit. This is especially true when they’re willing to listen to guidance from people invested in helping them, such as school counselors or college counselors.

Tasha:

Do you have any final words of wisdom for a student who might be listening and thinking, I want to be open to other options, but my dream has always been this Ivy League school? How can a student begin to rethink or expand that dream?

Alecia:

My final words of wisdom would be to look at this process as an opportunity for growth and self‑understanding. If you’re a high school student listening — maybe 16 or 17 — it’s completely normal not to know exactly what you want or who you want to become.

There’s a lot of pressure to have everything figured out: what you want to do, what you’re passionate about, and where you’ll be in 10 years. But what really matters is understanding what you enjoy, what you’re good at, and how those things might align with your future goals. That overlap can help guide you forward.

Focusing on your own values — rather than what others are doing or what you think you should be doing — can make this process more meaningful. Your goals and dreams will evolve as you learn more about yourself, especially once you’re in college. That’s the point: You’ll be exposed to new ideas, interests, and possible paths you hadn’t considered before.

If you can stay open‑minded now, it will serve you well in the long run. You’ll likely discover things you didn’t expect, and those discoveries are often where the greatest growth happens.

Tasha:

Wow. So many words of wisdom. Alecia, I’m so glad I asked that question, and I think that just about wraps up this episode of Just Admit It! Thank you so much, Alecia, for joining us.

Alecia:

Thank you for having me.

Tasha:

And that just about wraps up this episode of the Just Admit It! podcast. If you have any suggestions about what we should be covering, please email us at [email protected]. In the meantime, you can catch up on all our previous episodes by visiting our podcast page and be sure to bookmark our KnowledgeBase for additional help with navigating the complex and competitive admissions process.

At IvyWise, we bring together a team of former deans and directors of admission at top universities to give students, parents, and fellow educators the most up-to-date, higher ed news and practical admissions advice. Our experts help students navigate everything from college applications and K-8 planning to graduate school admissions and standardized testing.

Visit ivywise.com today to embark on your journey to your best fit schools with the world’s leading educational consultancy. From IvyWise, I’m your host, Tasha, and this has been Just Admit It!

See you next time.

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Editor’s Note: This transcript has been cleaned up and edited for clarity and readability.